Golf = @#$%

Golf. I find it ironic that golf is a four letter word because it is associated with every four letter word I know. When Shelby says, "Hey, I want to go golfing on Saturday," in my mind all I hear is, "@@#%&^%@@B !@*&^#@ @*&^#@, golf." I have golf inspired tourettes. You know how Pavlov rang the bell for food and his dog would automatically start drooling. The word golf does that to me. My blood pressure rises like 50 points, , I start breathing out my nose really hard, my right eye starts to get this tic.... Im pretty sure its what Bruce Banner feels when he turns into The Hulk. I can even tell when he wants to go golfing. Usually he will bring it up at dinner, starts the sentence with "Hey...", has one foot statregically placed towards the door.... So, if you ever see a big green Carlee chasing Shelby down the street you know he brought it up at the wrong time.
Other ironic four letter words: XBOX,hunt,text, ESPN.
Ok, Shelby is not bad AT ALL with the XBOX but there is just something about it....

Disclaimer: I just like giving Shelby a hard time, as long as he continues to play coed softball, he's good :)

Shelby-isms

For forever I have said I need to write a book about the many, ummm, crazy?, things Shelby says. It would be titled, "Things Not To Say To Your Wife." I've heard some good ones over the years and such as my memory is I have forgotten a lot of them...sigh.... Last week though he gave me another gem to add to the collection. He was watching the kids, I was out for awhile and by the time I got back he was pretty beat. Judson is a maniac, so I know he probably really was tired. I said,"This is what I go through everyday!" He says, " He is not as hard for you, he doesn't do these things when you're here." Stare down. Oh. No.You.Didnt! So, in the next day I decided to capture on film just how "easy" Judson is for me.

Judson likes to get in the pantry in search of potatoes everyday. All my potatos have mysterious test bites.

I can always tell where Judson is because there is a trail of destruction.

I swear this cupboard was clean this morning.

Can you see the water spilling? He also broke a plate and glass that day. Little stink.

Yeah....thats a banana from the garbage he is eating.

Judson loves dog food, he gets into it probably 20 times a day. He eats food out of the garbage, dog food,...ummm, is he trying to tell me something?

He feeds most of his food to the dog, maybe this is why he eats garbage food. That kind of hurts my feelings..

This is not even half of his misdeeds that day either.
1. When we went visit teaching, he somehow disengaged from his diaper and peed everywhere.
2. Ripped up two rolls of toilet paper.
3. Splashed around in the toilet a couple times.
4. Went up the stairs probably 15 times.
5. Multiple trips to the garbage can. Gross.
6. He somehow manages to get ahold of soda cans all the time. I seriously think he has a stash somewhere because half the time I don't know where they come from.
7. Put so many things in his mouth, who knows how many he actually swallowed, I could find 1.72$ in that kids diaper tomorrow.
I don't care what he does as long as he never takes off his diaper and poops in his crib ever, ever again.

That being said, at the end of the day, how could I ever be mad at this face? :)

I finally cracked and joined the blogging world! I have worst memory known to man, I'm pretty sure my first memory is at the early age of 24...ok, maybe not THAT bad, but you get the idea. I want to remember all the little things I think I will remember but probably never will, everyday things. My favorite kind of blogs are the ones about the good, the bad, and the ugly. Ones that have pristine children in matching outfits in every photo, never get mad at their husbands, have near mental breakdowns,their house is always clean, and cook four course meals three times a day, just aren't real. If we didn't have hard times we couldn't have good ones. Hey, I can be opinionated, its my blog! So, this is my uncensored account of living with three little beasts, and one big one :)

JACK aka JACK ATTACK

Camryn aka Cambone

Judson aka Judders

Shelby and Carlee